Spiritual dryness

It was a rainy week in Estes, too, which could be affecting everyone's mood!

So it seems like we're getting to that point in LT where everyone is tired, getting tired of being around the same people all the time and basically everyone just feels like they want to go home. Guess what? I'm feeling the same way. Just cause I'm an intern and just because I didn't go through that at all last year doesn't mean I'm immune from these feelings all the time!

This is part of the reason I didn't blog last week. I couldn't find the energy or the motivation to do so and I feel like I'm just kind of treading water right now. It's no fun.

Through this dry spot, I have felt God calling me to keep pushing on and persevering so I can see beautiful fruit at the end of the summer, but I honestly have no energy or desire to do that. It sucks because I know time at LT is precious and I need to take advantage of it, but every part of me is having a hard time desiring to be close to God. That sounds terrible, but a relationship is not always perfect, even with our Lord. Please pray that I can get over this spiritual low and that I can allow God to fill me up again as soon as possible.

The trial has allowed me to take the last couple of days to try and think and process why I am feeling this way, but I can't really pin it down at all to any specific things. This is something I have really struggled with too: feeling bad or uneasy and not knowing why.

Still, through processing all of this, I think what God is trying to teach me is that everything in ministry will not always be fun and games. That should be an obvious fact of life for me, but experiencing it so strongly here at LT while doing ministry work is giving me a good image of what to expect for a full-time staff member.

That's exactly what I wanted from this internship. I wanted to gain a full and clear picture of what full-time ministry could look like for me, both good and bad.

I don't want to be dishonest with anyone and tell everyone that it's all going great out here, but I don't want anyone to think that it has been a terrible last couple of weeks for me either. I've had some great project days, I got to hang out with my girlfriend, Irene, and there has been some awesome spiritual growth out here to watch! LT is still a great thing and I wouldn't rather be anywhere else for this whole summer.

I hope to post a more encouraging update next week!!

First Impressions

Well, now that I've been in Colorado for just over 24 hours (that's it?), I thought it'd be good to update everyone on how things are going. (Check out my Facebook for some pictures!)

After some complications on our second day of travel (sickness and a damaged front bumper at a gas station in Kansas), we arrived in almost one piece in beautiful Estes Park, Colorado at around 4:30 MT.

The scenery in Colorado is certainly awe-inspiring, as advertised. We are surrounded by snow capped mountains and as we were driving in, we saw three fully grown elk just kinda chillin by the side of the main road at the YMCA. I'm gonna have to get used to that, I guess! Even though it has been a bit rainy and cold here for the first couple of days, it's still just awesome to look around and see how great God's creation really is.

I have been really excited to come to Colorado for the last couple of months, but the first 24 hours have kind of been an up and down emotional experience for me.

Mostly, I'm confused because I have no clue why God sent me here. I feel in my heart that I am supposed to be here this summer, but He hasn't really shown me the specific reason why I am here yet. Maybe I'm here to make awesome friends, improve my evangelizing skills, push myself out of my comfort zone or grow really close to God. Heck, maybe it can be all of those.

I'm praying that God can show me how to best spend my time this summer. There are so many opportunities here which can make it kind of overwhelming, but I'm sure that there is a reason I am here and I trust that God will make this a very productive summer in preparation for my senior year.

Bt dubs, I just got back from the first meeting with my project group, which was fun. We ate dinner, heard a crazy story about some A&M people's car accident on the way to LT (everyone is safe!) and played some Catch Phrase. Our group is cool so far and I can't wait to see how God brings us together this summer!

Oh, I also found out that my official job for the summer will be working at the Rustic Cafe. It's kind of a Starbucks-type place on the YMCA grounds which seems like a nice place to work and was my most preferred job. PTL!